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Drinking Games #2

So, in an effort to celebrate my unemployment last week, I went out to the local supermarket to buy myself something tasty and yummy to drink. "Oh yes!" I thought. "Yummy and alcholic! I'm in Scotland, that should be easy."

I'm so cute when I'm terribly wrong.

(As an aside: You can buy vodka coolers with Irn Bru here. Which I find both scary and intriguing.)

Honey Ale

First things first: I have a horrible habit of picking out food, drinks, and books based entirely on "Oooh! Purty!" This, of course, is not a good idea.

I was browsing through the alcohol aisle (we don't have those in grocery stores in Canada) and stumbled upon an entire section of ales. "Ah hah!" I thought. "I don't really like beer unless it's a dark beer... and ale is just a fancy word for dark beer, right? And... and I drank that Guiness stuff, and it didn't kill me! I shall get ales!"

So, I grabbed a nice looking bottle of Honey Ale. I think somewhere in my head was the idea that it might taste like the Lindisfarne Honey Mead.

I am so not clever.

I got home, popped off the top, and had a taste.

...

....

.....

"It tastes like work socks!"

I tried valiantly to finish the whole bottle, hoping that it would grow on me (sorta like mold), but it didn't. I declared it a total failure for anything other than an amusing blog entry, and left it alone. Too bad in a frenzy of cleaning before I had guests over, I threw out the bottle. So, I can't even tell you any scary warnings on the side or anything like that.

But, all was not lost, for I had bought anothe bottle, of different ale! Maye this would be better.

Fraoch Heather Ale

This, I still have the bottle for.

Fraoch is Scotland's native ale. Fraoch is Gaelic for "Heather". Heather ale has been brewed in Scotland for four thousand years and is the oldest style of ale still madse in the world. The Picts who ruled Scotland until the 9th Century were known to brew the legendary heather ale, these "people of the designs" were the creators of the artistic style of our label. Scotland has ten million acres of wild flower heather, this natural resource being used to produce ales until the 18th Century when British legistlation forced Scottish Brewers to conform to the internatinal use of hops. This ale is produced to a 16th Century Scots-Gaelic repie from malted barley "bree", sweet gale and heather flowers. The hot ale is infused in heather flowers before being fermented in copper tuns. Fraoch has a floral, peaty aroma, full malt body, a spicy herbal flavour and a dry wine like finish. - Slatine.

Yes, I did buy it for the ultra-cool label, which you can see part of here.

I took one taste of it, and pronounced "It tastes like corpses."

After that, I didn't drink any more, and just went to bed.

Related Links:

Fraoch Brewery's Official Website

So, things I learned:

1) I really don't like ale, and I can't pretend I do.
2) Stop buying things based on either their nifty sounding names or their nifty looking bottles.

I predict I will have forgotten both of these points within a few hours.