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November 06, 2005

Leaving Town

Trying to summarise why I left my home city is far from easy. There is no single reason that prompted me to become an ex-pat. As many who read my blog know, prior to this move, I had lived in Edmonton my whole life. I can’t remember for sure when I first started talking about living elsewhere. It started out as an idea of going somewhere for University and eventually became more of an issue of just getting out.

It probably would have stayed as just talk if it hadn’t been for certain factors all coming together at the same time. The year before two of my closest friends moved out of province for career reasons. I can’t fault them in the least but it left a hole in my world. At the same time I was watching my good friend Trouble going through her own journey towards leaving the country again. The idea of Edmonton without three of my closest friends changed how I viewed the city.

I have often held that there are three things that I deeply want from my life. I hope for good friends, a life mate and a vocation. Most of my closest friends were in the process of scattering and I had to face the realisation that those who weren’t already on that path were likely to, especially the ones who, like me, were not focussed on fledgling families. I started to realise that I needed to seriously focus on other parts of my life.

My home university requires me to take a certain number of electives that can be done at any institute that isn’t St. Stephen’s. I have never been a fan of the University of Alberta and because of a mistake on my part the red tape to finish off my electives there would have been painful. I decided to do a test run of sorts and take a semester out of province.

That semester proved a lot of things to me. It proved that I could live without my support network even though there were problems. It also proved to me that Edmonton was no longer where I wanted to be. I learned a lot in being away and in coming back. It clarified a great deal in my mind about who my friends were. Some relationships picked up as strong or stronger than when I left and others didn’t. It also showed me that I couldn’t afford to leave my house with tenants.

Seeing Edmonton no longer as home and having gained some confidence left the door open to move farther afield. I wanted a new city and I wanted it outside of Canada. Its not that I have anything against Canada but it has always felt small to me in the social and political sense. I wanted to be part of a larger world an finally had the push I needed.

I don’t think I would rush to make another move. I’m not ruling out the possibility but there is so much where I am that I want to explore. I enjoy having a stable home to base from. As long as Edinburgh can be that home then I’m happy and would rather take short trips to other places than live there. Given time it may change but right now I love this city too much to leave.

Posted by Bluerevolutionist at November 6, 2005 02:11 PM

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